A Goddess Invents Her Own Life and Lives According to Her Own Vision.

It's true. I've always marched to the beat of my own drummer.  In my childhood, I was a bit of a tomboy, going to work with my dad (who was, at the time, a mason) and helping him by getting rid of the excess cement between the bricks.  While other girls were playing with their dolls, I was becoming a meticulous jointer.  Not very goddess-like, admittedly, but I was good at it. And it was fun. Years later, I'd realize that this attention to mortar had resulted in slight OCD around tasks like: writing on the board, putting up bulletin boards, and creating well-formatted documents.  I thank my Dad for this, as I see it as a strength, despite the snickers of many a-colleague. 

When I finally realized that there was no real future in jointing (not with bricks and mortar anyway), and I would go on to become the first one in my family to graduate from college.  Later, I'd become a teacher--another first.  Along the way to being the goddess of my very own classroom, I held many jobs: bacon slicer, lingerie saleslady, sandwich maker, daycare provider, bank operations check clearer, matchmaker, and office temp.  While some were mundane, others torturous, I like to think I was doing most of this work in my own vision.  Each job brought me closer to my current self.

While my professional life has been a hodge podge of questionable career choices, my personal life was only slightly more humiliating.  While I'd like to say that (like a true goddess) I never had hopes of impressing anyone, I have a long and sordid history of trying to inspire awe in the wrong people.  Jimmy Hicks, a local bad boy who attended the alternative school, stole my 7th grade heart.  He barely

looked at me (despite the pint of sun-in I'd put in my hair and unlit cigarette I'd held in a very sophisticated and overt manner) when he drove past me on his BMX en route to the local sand pit.  Sadly, I would not be deterred by his passive rejection.  Over the years (I won't admit how many), I would put together countless other absurd attention-getting ensembles to impress many a boy long after Jimmy had been locked up in juvie.  Things would pick up over time, but my lessons were many, and I think I was portraying a dysfunctional goddess at best during most of my courtships.

Try as I might, I couldn't quite figure out the way to be a unique individual and a cool one all at once.  What resulted, often, was an awkward, pitiful young woman perplexed at the lack of adoration from all sides.

As I've aged, I have become less concerned with what others think of me. I still want to be liked and appreciated. Heck, it'd be nice to even be adored.  But I don't hinge my self-worth on the opinions of others like I once did.  This has opened me up to trying new endeavors that would have otherwise passed me by.  In figuring out who I am, I revel in a variety of experiences that lead me to my vision. Here are a few bullets from my resume that may not impress anyone but certainly have helped me to define who I am:

• I hold a certificate in Whole Health Education
• I am a reverend, ordained by the Universal Life Church and I have performed six wedding ceremonies (one complete with smudging!) with two more coming up this month 
• I was previously a member of the Mormon Church & currently attend services at Unity
• I study and practice the Law of Attraction
• I am becoming a certified Angel Card Reader
  
  
• I am a health coach
• I drive a motorcycle
• I attend CrossFit & yoga classes regularly
• I am a certified health coach 
• I practice breathing (really...I'm not joking)
• I've been known to make jewelry
• I own four adorable animals who challenge and reward me all at once

These are just a few of the ways I've invented my own life.  While this list doesn't necessarily create a gelled vision of me, I'm not sure that yet exists.  I'm still working on my vision, and I hope it provides both depth and breadth of my character.  

Oh, yes.  I would further break the mold of expectations when I would leave a "safe" and "respectable" career in education to help folks get healthy.  This is clearly outside the norm (according to many people I know), but it's exciting to pursue a passion and not be stuck when the fires start to fade.  Stay tuned--I'll let you know how this one goes as I continue to invent and create my vision!